Kosong

Bismillah.

I'm in my study week period and my exam was supposed to be on this Friday, at 9.00 am. Yet I couldn't bring myself to study.

Have you ever feel that unsettled feeling in the heart? Like there's something going on but yet you don't know what it is. Like your heart is an empty space yet it's uncomfortable.

There we go.

Hati kosong. Empty. Blank.

Whenever this happens, I cannot even focus in anything especially studying. Hell, the feeling would come and "whatchu doin you supposed to take care of me" but then it doesn't let me know what the heck is the exact problem it facing. It doesn't leave any clue too.

It's making me crazy.

I barely study this study week. I studied for two hours but then started to get back to my smartphone, scrolling Twitter and watching videos from Youtube.

I don't even known what am I going to share today. I thought I have something to tell, but I don't.

I turned on my old laptop, with the intention to update the blog, with the hope that my fingers would speak my heart smoothly. But damn. It's true that the brain is the most important part of a human body.

If my brain couldn't decipher my heart, then my fingers couldn't too. My fingers need instructions from the brain to work.

The whole day I was staring at one place, thinking what the hell are you trying to convey you empty soul. What do you want?

It also makes me reflect of myself, that I've been an ignorant servant lately.

Remember Budak Tomato?

I've blogged about him before, just like a slight moment. I remembered a (paraphrased) quote from him.

"Kenapa hati yang kosong itu, bila kita isi dengan dunia, dia rasa lebih kosong? Sebab dunia tempatnya bukan di hati."

 So yeah.

Salam Alayk.

p/s: Ah, right after I posted this I remembered what I actually want to write but it's okay,  i'll save it for the next time.

very random photo i found in my phone